Timely Fashion
by FutureAuthoress
Summary: Stark has been late several days in a row. Steve and Thor will not stand for it. What's the time? TICKLING TIME.


Half an hour. Stark had been exactly half an hour late for three consecutive days. Steve Rogers wasn't quick to doubt; his first inclination was to give Tony the benefit of the doubt. These "Avengers" meetings were a new thing, and Iron Man was a busy man. His philanthropy earned him a soft spot in Steve's heart. After three days, however, with Tony arriving at precisely 4:30, Cap knew that it wasn't a holdup. _It was a control thing_.

Steve had known Tony well enough to recognize when he was being passive aggressive, blind himself as he might try. When Tony arrived late that fourth day, Steve lost his cool.

"Thank you for gracing us with your presence, _Iron Man_." He said, stiffly. "Thor? Bruce? Aren't we delighted to see Tony?"

Stark ignored it and sat down. Hulk and the Norse God exchanged confused looks.

"What I miss?" Asked Tony.

Steve bit his tongue as Fury calmly recapped matters already discussed. He gave Steve a mildly chastising look. Tony was downright smirking.

At the conclusion of the meeting, once they were alone, Tony said, "Maybe take a chill-pill next time, Cap!"

"Why do you do that?" Steve's tone was controlled.

"Do what?"

"Provoke people. If I didn't know any better, I'd say you enjoyed angering people."

Tony scoffed. "Don't be ridiculous." His voice was dripping with sarcasm.

Cap ground his teeth. "Stark, some days, you just…"

"Your behavior is unacceptable!" Thor's voice was suddenly thundering in the rom. "In order to function as a team, we must attempt to work together. Tony Star, as long as you are uncooperative, an alliance is impossible." The god's thick arms crossed over his chest, blue eyes gazing down harshly upon Iron Man.

Tony didn't even flinch. "So I was a little late once or twice! What's the big deal?"

"You have been tardy for a consistent amount of time every day this week." Thor stated.

"Everybody knows you didn't like the new meeting time, Tony." Cap added.

"C'mon you guys, I know I'm not the only one who thinks meeting every day is a little excessive."

"Only you think that, Tony, and it wouldn't matter if anyone agreed with you. Fury has been doing this for years; we are to trust his judgment for the time being." Steve tried to mask his irritation. Thor did not such thing.

"Nick Fury has requested that we deal appropriately with your noncompliance." He now loomed over the still-unblinking Tony Stark. "What method of torture did you prefer?" There was a tinge of sincerity in his voice.

"I doubt that's what he meant," interjected Steve.

"I am aware of Fury's intentions. I also have the overwhelming desire to strike Stark in the face."

"You'll get used to that," Tony assured him.

"Actually," Steve's face lit up, and Tony's attention was suddenly caught. "I know how to demonstrate to him the error of his ways."

"Hey!" Tony pointed an accusing finger. "You promised!"

"I don't remember promising anything," Cap's voice grew mischievous. "I only remember a threat."

"Steve, I swear to _god_, if you put one hand on me…" Tony had slowly backed against the wall, when Thor stopped him from bolting. He looked sincerely intrigued by the supposed crack in Iron Man's armor.

Completely outmuscled without his suit, Tony kicked into reasoning mode.

"C'mon, guys," he tried to pry Thor's arm from his chest as he spoke. "It's really not that big a deal. Today was the last day I was gonna do it, I swear!"

"So you admit you were doing it on purpose?" Steve emphasized his question with a slight jab at Tony's ribs.

Tony jerked slightly. "No! It wasn't on pur-PURPOSE!" Steve had poked him again.

Tony pulled harder on Thor's arm. "C'mon. If we're gonna do this, you gotta give me a fighting chance! No fair two against one."

"What are we doing to him?" Asked Thor, unaffected by Tony's struggling.

Cap's smirk was positively wicked. "Did you know that Iron Man is fatally ticklish?"

"_Steve!_" The threat in Tony's voice was made harmless when his voice hitched.

Realization dawned on Thor, who quickly moved to hold Tony's elbows to his broad shoulders, nearly stretching the brunette clear off the ground.

"Hey, not okay!" Tony protested, trying to grab on to something for leverage. "I object! Hey, keep your hands off of me, Stars and Stripes!"

Steve's hands made for Tony's t-shirt, fingers wriggling menacingly. "I think we deserve and apology." He said, seriously.

"You?!" Every muscle in Stark's body was tense, staring at those fingers in anticipation. "I'm the one being held against my will in—don't _don't!"_

Steve's hands rested just beneath Tony's underarms.

"I believe the captain requested you apologize." Thor said. "I suggest you comply."

There was a tense, still moment of silence.

"Technically, he's not even a captain…"

Fingers met fabric and Tony snapped his mouth shut. After a few seconds of struggling, he landed a kick to Steve's shin. Super human or not, the impact startled Steve. Thor promptly threw Iron Man to the ground, setting M_jölnir across the palms of his hands._

_ "That's cheating!" Tony cried, writing beneath the hammer. Cap pinned his thrashing legs with a knee._

_ "That," poke, "wasn't," poke, "very," poke, "nice." Several well-aimed attacks to soft abdominal flesh had Tony struggling anew, a blush rising in his cheeks and neck. He still didn't laugh._

_ "You shouldn't kick people, Mr. Stark." Teased Steve._

_ "Shouldn't…tickle…me-HEE!" Tony managed. Steve's hands slid to Tony's lower sides, eliciting giggles when they wriggled under his shirt. _

_ "Noho!" Tony began thrashing left to right, attempting to shield himself with the carpet._

_"Ohokay! You win! I'm down!" He became incoherent when those fingers traveled to the backs of his ribs. "Good g—Steve! That's great! Stop tickling me now! Steve – PLEASE!"_

_ The Captain continued drawing slow, torturous circles, deviating occasionally to his belly. The God of Thunder, who had been observing with amusement, exited the room upon summoning._

_ "Thor!" Tony shrieked. "Don't leave me alone with this lunatic! ____Hahaha—__please!"_

_ Steve stopped to give the inventor a moment to breathe. Dark curles stuck to his forehead, and sweat was beginning to bead on his face and body._

___"Truce__,__" he panted. "I'll be on time tomorrow, I promise! Please let me up."_

_ "Sorry, Tony, but I can't lift Thor's hammer."_

_ "I can't take it anymore!" He squirmed. "What are you doing?!"_

_ Cap scooted Tony's jeans below his hips; his pants barely covered him._

_ "Don't…you…dare."_

_ Steve looked Tony straight n the eyes, hands looming._

_ "Steve, please…"_

_ Thumbs met hipbones. Tony shrieked. He struggled and thrashed and kicked as best he could, yet the sporadic goosing of his hips didn't cease._

_"____Mercy!__" he screamed, guffawing madly, face red and eyes teary._

_"I want you to say you're sorry." Steve announced, continuing to torture Tony's sensitive sides._

_ Tony still wouldn't admit to his wrongdoing. "Please, Steve, I am ____begging__ you!"_

_ "I don't want begging, I want an apology."_

_ Thor returned. "Has he still not conceded?" It was really more of a statement than a question. _

_ "He's resorted to pleading," sighed Steve, as if bored with Iron Man writhing beneath him._

_ "Allow me," said Thor. Cap obligingly stepped aside. Thor knelt to the ground. Tony gasped for breath, tears streaking his glowing face. He appeared to be uncharacteristically trembling._

_"Thor! Buddy! Mind lifting the hammer? Getting kind of—whoa, hey don't do that!"_

_ Thor ripped the knees of Tony's jeans like they were paper._

_ "Didn't know you wanted to get into my pants so badly! Should have just asked, no reason to tear my –no no no…" Tony again commenced squirming as strong fingers wrapped around the backs of his legs._

_ "This is your final chance, Stark." Thor warned._

_ "Just…let me catch my breath, please." Tony tried to bring his legs together._

_ "You have thirty seconds to breathe and to contemplate your fate. Until then, I will accept your apology and show mercy."_

_ "Thirty seconds isn't long enough to—"_

_ "Twenty-nine seconds."_

_ "Thor, if you would just let me—"_

_ "Twenty-seven seconds. I suggest you conjure your apology or breathe in preparation."_

_ "Okay, but I think you should consider the example you're setting!"_

_ "Twelve seconds."_

_ "Cap! We're sensible men here, is this really an appropriate—"_

_ "Seven."_

_ "You're being—"_

_ "Six…"_

_ "Completely unreason—"_

_ "Five…"_

_ "Able! If you don't—"_

_ "Four…"_

_ "get off me…"_

_ "Three…"_

_ "Right this fucking second—"_

_ "Two…"_

_ "I'm gonna k—NO!"_

_ Thor's fingers dug into the backs of Tony's knees. His legs spasmed, biceps tightened, and howls of laughter escaped him._

_ "Gohahahahahad! NO! Please pleahehehehehease please! Hahaha…stohahahaHAP!" He tried in desperation to slide his hands away from the hammer, but its supernatural weight kept him firmly pinned while Thor tormented him._

_"Okay! I give! Uncle! UNCLE! I apologize or whatever crap you wanted me to say!"_

_ "Sorry, Tony," Steve was ducked down now by his head. "I just don't believe you." He smoothly hiked Tony's shirt up past his head, to his elbows, and started in on his armpits."_

_ "SERIOUSLY?!" Tony shrieked, choking on his laughter. "I said I was sorry! ____I said I was SORRY!"_

_"Sorry for what?" Cap's fingertips kept a steady, torturous pace. Thor continued kneading his bare flesh._

_ Tony looked half hysterical, as though he may cry._

_ "Sorry that…hahaha…I'm sohorry that I was LATE! Oh, god, Steve please! Please, stop!"_

_ "Sorry that you were late? Is that all?"_

_ Tony may have been sobbing. "I'm…I'm…s-s-sorry for my ahahahattitude! Thor, DON'T! I'm sorry…haha…____please…__"_

_ "Say it, Stark!" Steve emphasized the order by skimming his fingers down Tony's sides, causing him to jerk and scream._

_ "____Please!__"_

_ "I'm waiting."_

_ After a pinch to his kneecaps, Tony shouted, "OKAY! Alright! I'm sorry that…sorry that….____sorry that I tried to get my way by purposefully inconveniencing the team!__ Hahaha…I am so so sorry!"_

_ Cap gave Thor a slight nod and smirk, ceasing the skritching under Tony's arms. Thor elicited one final squeak with a pinch to his thighs._

_ The Iron Man lay on his back, gasping for breath. His chest heaved, tshirt damp with sweat. After a moment, a low grumble resonated from his throat. "Thor, pick up that hammer so I can ____murder STEVE."_

_Cap wasted no time jumping from the floor and darting through the door. _

_ Despite his homicidal tone, a smile played Tony's lips. Upon his release, he gave Thor a punch to the shoulder before running after Steve, nearly knocking Bruce over in the doorway. Thor laughed. The captain wouldn't be caught unless he wanted, and suitless-Tony was relatively harmless anyway._

_ Bruce stared after Tony and gave Thor an inquisitive look. "Do I want to know?"_

_ "Tony Stark will not be late again." Was Thor's short response._

_ He wasn't._


End file.
